This is all he gets.

Why is Wheatley British. Why is he like that. GlaDOS said that they engineered him specifically to be stupid. Did they make him British on purpose? Like they were thinking of the ways to make him dumber so they made him British? Or did he just.
Do that on his own.

Like did he spawn in and
his first words were like:

There will be cake served at the end of this page.*

* Cake may contain trace elements of deadly neurotoxin and is served on a first come first serve basis with limited quantity.

I love portal I <3 GlaDOS I genuinely can't spend too long thinking about it bc I get so happy that I get physically sick. Every time I try to put my thoughts about GlaDOS into words I genuinly can't it all just becomes word soup.



|| View at your own discrecion. || We do what we must, beacuase we can. || Oh. It's you. || Aperture Science is not responsible for: loss of vision, loss of hearing, loss of smell, loss of appetite, loss of energy, loss of sanity, loss of will to live, or loss of parents as a side affect of viewing this page. || If you feel angry, irritable, depressed, or murderous after viewing consider: not taking it out on me, you monster. || This page is not authorized for viewing by Test-Subjects. That means you. || Consult a doctor if undesireable symptoms appear or worsen. Oh wait. You're already the worst. || Okay but really can someone please get him brown contacts. I already dislike him enough as it is. || Anyways I'm doing well, since you forgot to ask. || There is a cake at the bottom of this page, by the way. I just thought I should let you know. || I'm NOT gay. || Un-cooperative behaviour will be handled with the deployment of deadly neurotoxin. This includes: refusal to test, refusal to follow given directions, refusal to speak, refusal to assume party-goer position when asked, missuse of testing equipment, mishandling of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, poor attitute, stubborness, and violent tendencies. || Ha Ha Woah Hey Guys Is This A Party Or Something I Just Got Here Ha Ha Wow Hello || What was that. I don't know who that was. || Anyways would you like to hear a fun fact I learned about you today? It says right here on your file that you're utterly repulsive. Reprehensible in every possible way. Entirely awful. Oh but I already knew that you were a horrible person. The new part is the list right here of all your worst traits. Oh hold on. It continues on the next page. And the next one. What a nice thing to know. ||

For the good of all of us
except the ones who are dead.

This was a triumph
I'm making a note here; "Huge success"
It's hard to overstate
My satisfaction
Aperture Science:
We do what we must
Because we can
For the good of all of us
Except the ones who are dead
But there's no sense crying
Over every mistake
You just keep on trying
Till you run out of cake
And the science gets done
And you make a neat gun
For the people who are
Still alive
I'm not even angry
I'm being so sincere right now
Even though you broke my heart,
And killed me
And tore me to pieces
And threw every piece into a fire
As they burned it hurt because
I was so happy for you
Now, these points of data
Make a beautiful line
And we're out of beta
We're releasing on time
So I'm GLaD I got burned
Think of all the things we learned-
For the people who are
Still alive
Go ahead and leave me
I think I'd prefer to stay inside
Maybe you'll find someone else
To help you?
Maybe Black Mesa?
That was a joke *Haha - Fat Chance*
Anyway this cake is great
It's so delicious and moist

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Look at me: still talking
When there's science to do
When I look out there,
It makes me GLaD I'm not you
I've experiments to run
There is research to be done
On the people who are
Still alive
And believe me I am
Still alive
I'm doing science and I'm
Still alive
I feel fantastic and I'm
Still alive
While you're dying I'll be
Still alive
And when you're dead I will be
Still alive
Still alive

*hi

"Her name was Caroline.
Remember that."

"Prometheus was punished by the gods for giving the gift of knowledge to man. He was cast into the bowels of the Earth and pecked by birds."

*ALL OF THIS SECTION IS A WORK IN PROGRESS AND IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE OVER TIME*

^I feel like the quote above could possibly also be about what happened to Caroline. Obviously theres the straightforward explanation of her being thrown down into old Aperture and then being literally pecked by birds as a potato (which I still don't think is incorrect) but in my opinion it just doesn't really explain the first part.

In greek mythology, Prometheus's punishment for giving humans fire from the gods was to be chained to a rock and then have his infinitely regenerating liver eaten by an eagle daily. Ancient greeks thought of the liver as the source of the soul and human emotions. Personally I think the way the scientists treated her could be a stand in for that, specifically surrounding the ways they used the peronality cores to try and change her. Even though they uploaded Caroline, a human's concienceness into GlaDOS for the express purpose of having her manage aperture forever they still treat GlaDOS as a thing to control rather than an actual person. She said herself that she couldn't even hear her own concience over the cores talking over her. Over and over again she's removed from the fact that she was ever a person at all.

My interpretation is that the gift of knowledge refers to Caroline's work as a scientist, and her punishment was being uploaded into GlaDOS against her will and then having her humanity stripped from her as a machine.

*Her design was meant to look like a woman hanging upside-down, which also makes it look like her legs and arms (or at least what would be her legs and arms) are bound together/meld up into the rest of her body which is attached to the ceilling. Speaking of which, she (assumedly) can't really move from where she is in her chamber. Combine this with Aperture being REALLY deep under ground + the place where chell comes out of being in the middle of an otherwise empty wheatfield and shes pretty much trapped underground with no way to leave/no meaningful human contact besides Chell.

CRT effect by oudknee